From London to Adelaide....its just a flight what could possibly happen?!

Good morning all, finally from a rather windy but always wonderful Adelaide!! Yes, you read that right we are here, we are settled in and we are raring to go! First night's memories already banked but before then we have a little matter of 24 hours on a plane to deal with....

So what can you find to talk about a few hours on plane? This is me remember and I have a cunning knack of observing some of life's little subtitles so lets begin.

We were dropped off at Heathrow by V's oldest Josh and after the tearful goodbyes had been made we were off to check in, say cheerio to our bags until Adelaide, get through security and find a pub for some customary pre flight dinkies and noms.

And find it we did, and after a small pay day loan was taken out to by a couple of beers and some food, we just began to finally chill and chatted about our forthcoming adventure,  Which in itself was a strange thing for me as in years gone by I have sat in the exact same position but alone, people watching and writing notes in my little book ready to entertain my blogging public.  So it was different, but a good different and I liked it.  Very much.

Before you know it, despite getting to the airport with enough time to drive to Scotland and back, it was time to board the big old Singapore Airline Airbus A380 on the first leg of our trip, all 13 hours of it.  We settled into our seat, hellos exchanged with the guy by the window in our row (good luck in your new life in Melbourne young man) and we soon taxi-ing silently down the runway and up and away into the clouds.

So, here it comes. You take off, you cruise at 35,000ft, you land.  Simple,  If only.  Here listed are just some of my observational highlights of this, our first long haul flight to the land of Oz.....Dorothy and Tito would have been proud (and there were times when I wished having this much fun was as easy as clicking two shiny red shoes together three times.....!)

'I will Survive' playing in the Heathrow toilets, fine for me as I practised my karaoke set but not so for those with a slight fear of flight.

Being a little bit squiffy and getting equally a little stressed making sure that V was enjoying the who airport experience as much as I normally do and with as much vigour....he assured me he was on several occasions.

Boarding the massive plane that was to transport us effortlessly halfway round the World and still pondering the dynamics of how something that bloody heavy can fly (I have the same issue with boats and floating and, incidently, how electricity really works....)

Putting on too much sampler perfume in the Duty free shop and coking on Miss Dior as the sales assistance looks on with a sneer.

Going to put on my flight socks to try (and usually failing) to avoid the customary in flight canckle, and remembering with fondness the time I took my Pops into the Parent with Child room to do the self same thing for him and the looks we got as we came out to find parents with children waiting to get inside, and walking past with my head held high stating 'well he is my parent and I am his child....'

Having the flight deck making their welcome announcement to us all and giggling slightly at the name of the Captain I thought I had just heard.

Then crying with laughter when V repeated his name by shouting 'Captain Cheesyboy' in a totally inappropriate accent for a flight to Singapore (think Cartman in Southpark asking people to respect his authoro-ta!).  Even the guy by the window spat out his chai latte....

Realising that there was not only a screaming child several rows ahead, but also a rather disturbing number of people with what can only be described as mania inducing coughs.  The mania being all mine.

Noting that no child in the history of parenting has EVER shusshed when told to shush by a parent. Apparently angry stares and tuts from irritated ginger passengers doesn't help either.

Wishing I'd ordered a gluten free meal.  Sorry to all the other passengers who followed me into those very small plane toilets.

Realising the Eau du Toilette in the toilets is exactly what it says on the tin.

And why is it the 'return to your seat and fasten seatbelt' sign always come on when you have finally decided now is the time you need that poo....?

Whining about getting no little bag filled with fluffy socks and a toothbrush to the point of self annoyance and then feeling very humble as the ridiculously petite and beautiful stewardess handed us all the aforementioned item.

Me and V proudly stating we had got each other a present from the toilet.....and producing a hair comb at exactly the same moment.  And also declaring that after 12 hours on this plane we had finally realised the extremely watery and not very efficient minty smelling soap was in fact mouthwash.....

Then there was four hours in Singapore airport with the customary 'how much???' at the bar for two beers whilst using the free 'everyone can now hack into your accounts and steal your identity' wifi then heading to the transit boarding lounge to find the passengers on the next (and thankfully 6 hours shorter) leg were actually all members of the cast of either 'Nothing to Declare' or 'Kath and Kim (google them both, I shit you not) 

Being amazed at most of their inability to count to 6 which made boarding in sequential numbers up to 6 very very stressful for the poor gate attendant, but highly amusing for us and telling V to be ready to get of the plane before them all or we would be stuck at the back of the customs queue whilst exasperated Boarder Force workers tried to tell them that the uncooked duck gill blood products wrapped in still growing plankton were indeed prohibited items to being into Australia.

Resembling Eagle Eyed Action man and spotting a row of 4 seats that were unoccupied and stating our claim, much to the annoyance of Bert and Beryl from Manchester who were sitting behind.  All's fair in love and plane travel people, age is not a factor!

So with 4 seats to ourselves we enjoyed the last leg of our journey in relative comfortable slumber until our final destination appeared on the little screen on the back of the seat in front and our rather large tin can came down effortlessly to land in my second home. D

espite sitting in a cold drafty large tin can for over 20 hours next to the toilets with a screaming child and a hacking coughing woman who seemed to drink a pint of Tiger Balm every time she spat up something unidentifiable, in a seat that could only be comfortable for someone with an arse the size of Kylie and being tired, irritable, crumpled and drier than a piece of cuttlefish in the bottom of a budgie cage (2 hourly wash and moisturising sessions not withstanding) we'd made it!! Together!

And that was our arrival, we were now on the other side of the World, ready to embark on a adventure we had talked about for months and worked very hard to achieve.  The stress would all be worth it.....I promise!!

You know the drill, the next instalment will not be far behind and I just hope I can keep you all entertained in the way you have become accustomed!!  So until later my faithful followers it remains.....TTFN xxx

 

No Vince.....